Peace of Shit

Check out the Pints Templars new card game Peace of Shit:

Your mission is to gather energy credits by taking as many shits as possible.

Collect Food

Trade For Resources

Combine items to take a shit

Bigger combinations mean bigger shits

Watch out as the other players are all out to steal your shit

Guano, or bat shit, has been valued as a fertilizer for centuries thanks to it’s high Nitrogen content. Over the years as competition between industrial agricultural manufactures grew the need for super effective fertilizers grew as well. As scientists raced to find the perfect additive that would maximize the efficiency of the Nitrogen in Guano a strange event happened. Some call it a miracle, some call it science gone mad, most just call it “The Shit Heard Round The World”.

Late one night an explosion, so large that it caused an earthquake, shook a sleepy little town out of their beds. In the morning the town was crawling with agents from every major energy company, government agency, and news agency in the country. The explosion you see was the result of an experiment by a local scientist. In his private lab what they found changed the world. He had created a liquid that when dropped on Shit instantly changed the nitrogen in the shit to concentrated liquid Nitrogen. He had gone into a cave to test the experiment but miscalculated how much shit there was in the cave, the enclosed space, the massive shit, and the instant chemical changes combined to blow the top off the cave, killing him instantly.

This additive however meant that shit everywhere could be converted to energy! Chaos ensued as companies everywhere scrambled to produce their own formula. Wars began to be fought over massive piles of bull shit, horse shit, and hog shit. Even chicken shit was getting in on the action since a handful of chicken shit could power your car. Yet strangely society had a moral objection to using Human shit as a power source. It may have had something to do with the fact the energy companies paid congress to make it illegal, or that high profile examples were made of people who were caught making power from their own shit, or maybe it was just the endless advertisements condemning the practice of “smoking your own shit”.

Humans have never been good at giving a fuck what congress says to do. So people all over the planet began to manufacture their own energy, it was a great gig after all, eat like a champ, take a massive dump, put the poo in “converter” that safely converts it into stored energy, then sell the energy or use it yourself. Some people stopped working entirely and began supporting themselves completely by getting rich taking massive dumps. There was a stock market for shit, shit meets, shit offs, shit ons, shit ins, it was generally an all you can shit party until the government decided to crack down on the whole shit show. The companies after all wanted to protect their shity profits and businesses didn’t need their employees spending all day in the shitter. The reaction from the public was instant, everyone everywhere stopped working at the same time, and went on a shit break.….for 3 days…until a solution was found. The solution was called the Peace of Shit.

From now on people would no longer be allowed to own home converters for their shit. Everyone would use a community shitter that would convert the energy, and this energy would be taxed. However you would receive the remaining profit for all your shit. Each person would be assigned a time and a group. Their group could use the shitter for 3 days a month or until the shitter had maxed out on the number of big shits the machine could safely process. The result was utopia. Now instead of working everyone in the world has 27 days of vacation and 3 days of gluttony. The only thing holding you back from your dreams now is the shit you need to make them happen. Welcome to Peace of Shit.